Out of the
Empty cans A little
boy went up to his mother one day while holding his stomach
and said, "Mum, my stomach hurts." His mother replied, "That's
because it's empty, you have to put something into it!" Later
that day when the Priest was over for dinner, the Priest began
to feel sick. Holding his head he said, "I have a very bad
headache!" The little boy looked up at him giving him the
sweetest smile that any little child could give. Then he said,
"That's because it's empty, you have to put something into
Putting the world together A father
who was trying to read a magazine was being bothered by his
little daughter, Jane. So, he took a sheet out of his
magazine, where the map of the world was printed. He tore it
into small pieces, gave it to Jane, and said, "Go into the
other room and try to put this together." In a few minutes,
Jane came back and gave him the map correctly fixed together.
The father was very surprised and asked how she had finished
so fast. "Oh", she said, "on the other side of the paper is a
picture of Jesus. When I got Jesus in His place, then the
world came out all right."
Sob story One day,
I saw two little girls crying a lot on a bench in the park.
Thinking they might be hurt, I went over and asked them. "Are
you all right?" Still crying, one girl showed me her doll and
said, "My baby's arm came off." I took the doll from the girl
and soon fixed her arm. "Thank you." came a whisper. Next, I
asked her friend, "and what's the matter with you, young
lady?" She wiped her cheeks and said, "I was helping her cry."
Green lies A
4-year-old boy was asked to say thanks before Christmas
dinner. He began his prayer thanking God for all his friends,
naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy,
brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and
uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food. He gave
thanks for the turkey, the fruit salad, the pies and all the
cool cakes. Then he paused, and everyone waited -- and waited.
After a long silence, the boy looked up at his mother and
asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won't he know that
A nine year old girl was in church
with her mother when she started feeling sick. "Mommy" she
said "Can we leave now?" "No" her mother replied. "Well, I
think I have to throw up!" "Then go out through the front door
to the back of the church and throw up behind a bush." In two
minutes the little girl came back to her seat. "Did you throw
up?" her mother asked. "Yes" the girl replied. "How could you
have gone all the way to the back of the church and return so
fast?" "I didn't have to go out of the church, Mommy" the
little girl replied, "They have a box next to the front door
that says 'for the sick'."
One Sunday, a small boy was being
difficult during the 10 o'clock Mass. The parents tried to
keep their child quiet, but that didn't work very well.
Finally, the father picked the little fellow up and carried
the boy outside. Just before they reached the door, the boy
yelled loudly to the people, "Pray for me! Pray for me!"
One day, a father was at the beach
with his family, when his four-year-old son ran up to him,
grabbed his hand, led him to the shore and showed him a
seagull that lay dead in the sand. "Daddy, what happened to
him?" asked the little boy. "He died and went to Heaven," his
dad answered. The boy thought a moment and then said, "So, did
God throw him back down?"
During a children's sermon, the priest asked the
children what "Amen" meant. A little child raised her hand and
said, "It means 'That's all